A Journey of Transformation: 3 Months of Adventure and Growth

It was January 2023, and I found myself standing at a crossroad in my life. I had built a comfortable existence in Glasgow—my own flat, a fulfilling job and running my makeup studio, and a great circle of friends. On the surface, it seemed like I had it all. Yet, a feeling persisted, a sense that something crucial was missing.

The year before, I had embarked on a memorable girls' trip to Dubai. That experience opened my eyes to the vastness of the world, the countless adventures waiting to be had. It planted a seed deep within me, and I made a promise to myself as I returned home: One day, I would explore the world. I knew I had to work relentlessly, save every penny, and turn my dream of strolling on a Bali beach in flowing gypsy pants into a reality.

Craving Something More

But here I was, in January of this year, utterly burnt out. Despite my efforts, I felt that my cherished vision was slipping away from me. The thought of Bali beaches and the freedom they symbolised seemed more distant than ever. The relentless pursuit of my dreams had taken its toll, which made me doubt my vision. But throughout my exhaustion, I realised that craving something more meant diving into self-discovery, embracing every experience, and pushing beyond my comfort zone. (Yikes)

With renewed purpose, I prepared to leave behind the safety of my Glasgow life. The yearning for more grew stronger, forcing me into a world of uncertainty, adventure, and the promise of finding the missing piece of myself.

Embracing Change

To break free, sacrifices had to be made. I handed back the keys to my flat and studio, and I quit my job. Anxiety coursed through me as I approached my parents for support. Thankfully, they were incredibly understanding and backed me wholeheartedly. Their belief in me gave me the confidence I needed to take this leap of faith. With their support, I set off on my adventure, knowing I had their love and encouragement every step of the way. I think they maybe knew I needed this more than I did myself. 

Exploring the World

My boyfriend and I started our journey in London, ready to explore together. Our first stop was Hanoi, Vietnam. After a long 12-hour flight, we arrived in this beautiful country, excited to spend two weeks exploring from North to South.

Looking back, Hanoi was a vibrant and overwhelming experience, especially with the added challenge of jet lag. The buzzing scooters, the enticing smell of Pho wafting in the air of every street corner, the lively atmosphere of the old quarter - it was a sensory overload. Yet, amidst the whirlwind, there was an undeniable magic that made the city truly special.

My favourite destination of Vietnam had to be Hoi An, also knows as the lantern city. It was also my birthday, which made our 3 nights there even more special. Every meal we had was exceptional and filled with flavour, the relaxing vibe the place had, and floating around the coconut forrest made it a super fun experience. 

Next, we were on route to wonderful Thailand, where we would be spending a month on the remote island of Koh Mak, just on the gulf of Cambodia. I loved Koh Mak. It really felt like it was time to slow down and spend some time with myself. The island was slow paced, but very developed. I was surrounded by fellow digital workers, (now close friends). I was so inspired to work on myself and plant the foundations of what I wanted 'Face by Emily Snow' to really be. On a personal note, I faced some challenges over that month...

My relationship started to become slightly rocky. I wasn't sure what direction I wanted to go down, who I wanted to be, and how exactly to show up for myself in a career sense. I felt a lot of pressure to work and figure it out and quickly, almost like there was an imaginary clock and if I didn't figure it out by the end of the four weeks being there, nothing would work out. I decided to slow down, take breaks, go walks, sup boarding at sunset, read and journal. Boy oh boy was that therapeutic!  

We left beautiful Koh Mak and headed for the final destination, Bali. I almost couldn't believe it, my dream was coming true! 

As I write this on Wednesday, May 24th, I can't help but feel sad as my Balinese trip hasn't unfolded exactly as I envisioned. We began our journey in Ubud, a place surrounded by jungle, monkeys, and vibrant vegan culture. The abundance of yoga and meditation centers created a peaceful atmosphere, grounding me and deepening my connection to spirituality like never before.

However, as the days passed, I sensed a growing distance in my relationship. Like any relationship, it had its imperfections, but there was an underlying feeling that we might not be the right fit for each other. And so we broke up.

Leaving behind familiar company, I ventured towards Canggu on a solo trip. Feelings of fear and loneliness washed over me, yet within me I knew I held a belief that this was the right decision for me.

Having spent nearly three months constantly with company, it's time to rely on my own strength, process my thoughts, and engage in the soul-searching I had initially set out to do. The beachside atmosphere has stole my heart and the sunsets paint a masterpiece, unlike anything I had ever seen before.

Lessons Learned

As we boarded the flight to Hanoi, an unexpected sense of calm washed over me. It was as if I had prepared myself for whatever challenges lay ahead. Little did I anticipate that this journey would bring heartbreak, profound internal healing, and the need to confront and overcome my own detrimental habits. 

As I write these words, It's not all doom and gloom. It has granted me a newfound sense of independence that I have never experienced before. The ability to be at peace with my own company has gave me a strength i've never known before.

When it comes to relationships, I now understand that true validation and fulfilment come from me. Rather than seeking it in other people, I now recognise the importance of living rent-free within myself, discovering my own worth, and relying on my own inner resources for happiness. This realisation has been a powerful feeling, and very bittersweet. 

With just under three weeks remaining before I return home, I feel a mixture of emotions. There's a bit of sadness in leaving this adventure behind, yet I'm also filled with anticipation for what awaits me. My lovely brides of 2023, promising job opportunities, my family and friends, the joy of a new baby, and a wedding, my heart could burst.

This article serves as a healing journey for me, as I embrace vulnerability and share my experiences openly. In a world where social media often shows a distorted image of constant happiness, I wanted to break free from that facade and show that it's okay to have ups and downs.

During my travels, I felt the pressure to present a picture-perfect life, desperately wanting to live up to the idea of "living my best life" and wanting others to believe it too. However, behind the scenes, I encountered my fair share of challenges that made it all feel disingenuous.

I want you to know that it's perfectly normal to be vulnerable and authentic, even when it comes to social media. Over the past three months, my journey has been a rollercoaster ride, filled with both incredible highs and lows. These experiences are all part of the normality of life, and it's essential to embrace them with honesty and self-compassion.

Thank you for taking the time to read this, it wasn't an easy one to write. But, I hope it helps someone out there that shares similar experiences and to know that everything works out exactly as it should. Trust your intuition and know your worth, always!